Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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