Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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