Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
and she was petting her beer can
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
