whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
now i know why i became what i already was.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
