hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
