we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
why is half of my head shaved?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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