Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
