god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
