My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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