so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
