There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I can't turn off my feet"
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
