Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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