omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
