My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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