I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
