If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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