Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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