marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
So much rum. So many feels.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize