your parents love me but you hate me
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize