Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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