I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
