well I can't set my house on fire every night
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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