i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
It's just like the Real World with babies
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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