dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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