Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
