Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
My penis needs a shock collar
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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