In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
