I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
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