There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
