New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
