I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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