office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you traded sex for a burrito?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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