I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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