It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
