i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
His nipple licking is glorious
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