wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
