so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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