I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
