I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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