You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
