i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Randomize