I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
