is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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