alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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