I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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