and you said cock pushups were impossible
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm bleeding and have questions
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
