singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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