its not stalking. its research.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize