someone get that fucking seahorse.
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
