It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
