Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Randomize
