i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize